“True leadership isn’t just about achieving goals; it’s about appreciating the people who make those goals possible.”
– Brene Brown
Let’s face it – nobody’s perfect, especially in leadership. If you’re driven, opinionated, or results-driven, there’s a good chance you’ve had moments (or seasons) where people would describe you as a “difficult” leader.
Maybe you’ve been impatient, too blunt, or hyper-focused on goals to the point of forgetting the people behind them. (Finger pointing to myself as I type this)
But here’s the good news: Leadership is in no way, shape, or form, about perfection. It’s about progress — and gratitude is one of the easiest ways to make that progress, no matter where you’re starting from.
Gratitude is a multiplier. It improves relationships and builds trust. But if you’re the kind of leader who struggles to “soften their edges”, expressing gratitude might not come naturally. So, here are some practical ways you can show thankfulness this Thanksgiving season (even if you’re still a work in progress like we all are).
1. Acknowledge Your Humanity – Start by being honest with yourself and your team. If you know you’ve been a bit of a jerk sometimes, own it. A simple “I know I can be tough sometimes, but I want you to know I see and value what you do” can go a long way. People appreciate authenticity, even more than polished perfection. Admitting your flaws makes your gratitude feel genuine. Like my leadership influence Craig Groeschel says “people would rather follow a leader that is real, than one that is always right”.
2. Be Specific in Your Thanks – A generic “thanks” doesn’t cut it. Don’t just tell someone, “Hey man, I appreciate you.” Tell them why.
- “I appreciate how you handled that pain in the butt customer last week. You kept your cool and represented our company with utmost integrity. THAT is how it’s done. ‘fist bump’”
- “Thank you for staying later to make sure that backyard project hit the allocated man hours. I don’t take your effort for granted.”
- “Thank you for always keeping your truck and equipment nice and clean and maintained. I appreciate it more than you know.”
Specificity shows that you’re paying attention, even if you don’t always say it.
3. Use Your Leadership Style to Add Value – If you’re the no-nonsense, action-oriented leader, you don’t have to write long, emotional letters to express gratitude. Use your strengths:
- Give team members opportunities to shine by taking on bigger projects or difficult to please clients.
- Advocate for their development and personal growth
- Publicly celebrate their wins or celebrations in a meeting with others or on your social media.
I can’t express this enough that your actions can communicate gratitude just as powerfully as words.
“Thankfulness is the soil in which humility grows. A great leader never forgets the people who help them succeed.”
4. Say It Out Loud – This might sound obvious, but don’t underestimate the power of simply telling people you’re grateful. Whether it’s in a one-on-one meeting, a group setting, or a personal note, take the time to express appreciation. Leadership can be lonely, but your team doesn’t know you value them unless you actually tell them!
5. Reflect on What You’re Thankful For – Gratitude isn’t just for your team – it’s also for you. Take time this Thanksgiving to reflect on what you’re grateful for in your own leadership journey. Maybe it’s the lessons learned from failures. Maybe it’s the team that has stuck by you, even when things were tough and you weren’t the easiest to work with. When you focus on gratitude, you’ll find yourself leading with more grace!
I’ll tie a bow on this Thanksgiving share with this… Growth is all about progress over perfection. Being a leader means influencing others, even when you don’t get everything right. Gratitude is one of the most powerful ways to build connection and pursue growth for yourself and others – even if you’re still working on softening your rough edges a bit!
So this Thanksgiving, and moving forward, don’t aim to be the perfect leader. Aim to just be a grateful one. Gratitude doesn’t just improve your team – it improves you. And who knows? With enough practice, you might not be such an asshole after all.
I’m grateful for all of y’all. Happy Thanksgiving!
Your Leadership Amigo,
Sam